To Say Nothing of the Kitteh

To all my Navy peeps...

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 19:33:22 GMT

Memories of being underway at Christmas, lol. This one goes out to all my shipmates, and to everyone spinning circles in the water in the middle of nowhere, keeping it locked down so the rest of us can celebrate in peace.

Twas the night before Christmas,
the ship was out steaming,

Sailors stood watch
while others were dreaming.

They lived in a crowd
with racks tight and small,

In a 40-man berthing,
cramped one and all.

I had come down the stack
with presents to give,

And to see inside
just who might perhaps live.

I looked all about,
a strange sight did I see,

No tinsel, no presents,
not even a tree.

No stockings were hung,
shined boots close at hand,

On the bulkhead hung pictures
of a far distant land.

They had medals and badges
and awards of all kind,

And a sober thought
came into my mind.

For this place was different,
so dark and so dreary,

I had found the house of a Sailor,
once I saw clearly.

A Sailor lay sleeping,
silent and alone,

Curled up in a rack
and dreaming of home.

The face was so gentle,
the room squared away,

This was the United States Sailor today.

This was the hero
I saw on TV,

Defending our country
so we could be free.

I realized the families
that I would visit this night,

Owed their lives to these Sailors
lay willing to fight.

Soon round the world,
the children would play,

And grownups would celebrate
on Christmas Day.

They all enjoyed freedom
each day of the year,

Because of the Sailor,
like the one lying here.

I couldn't help wonder
how many lay alone,

On a cold Christmas Eve on a sea,
far from home.

The very thought
brought a tear to my eye,

I dropped to my knees
and started to cry.

The Sailor awakened
and I heard a calm voice,

"Santa, don't cry,
this life is my choice."

"Defending the seas
all days of the year,

So others may live
and be free with no fear."

I thought for a moment,
what a difficult road,

To live a life guided
by honor and code.

After all it's Christmas Eve
and the ship's underway!

But freedom isn't free
and it's sailors who pay.

The Sailor say's to our country
"be free and sleep tight,

No harm will come,
not on my watch and not on this night.

The Sailor rolled over
and drifted to sleep,

I couldn't control it,
I continued to weep.

I kept watch for hours,
so silent, so still,

I watched as the Sailor
shivered from the night's cold chill.

I didn't want to leave
on that cold dark night,

This guardian of honor
so willing to fight.

The Sailor rolled over
and with a voice strong and sure,

Commanded, "Carry on Santa,
It's Christmas, and All is Secure!"

Honor, Courage and Commitment

I'll be Home for Christmas by Adrianna Dane/ Carol of the Bellskis by Astrid Amara

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 08:38:55 GMT

Blurb:
Destrie Two Rivers and Benedict Webster--an orphaned half-Indian and a wealthy rancher’s son. Men who were boyhood best friends, turned secret lovers when they were eighteen. And then one nightmarish night they were discovered and Destrie almost died as a result.

Now, eight years later, just before Christmas, Destrie, an Army sniper, returns to Wyoming on leave to attend the funeral of his foster father. Both men have changed and the distance between them seems wider than the Continental Divide with no way to breach the chasm.

But just as the creek where they first made love runs powerful and constant, Destrie and Benedict’s passion for each other still burns undeniably deep and everlasting. Re-igniting their unquenchable desire could prove fatal. Until the heavy guilt and shocking secrets of the past are revealed, neither of these two men can truly come home for Christmas.

Bottom line up front:
What stinking pile of bullshit is this? DNF!

The rest:
I haven't the faintest idea how someone could take what should have been an interesting story arc and screw it up with some highly improbable scenes. Yet it happens.

Destrie (gawd, I kept wanting to tack an 'r' at the end of that name) left town and joined the military after his boyfriend's brother cut him up. He came back for his foster father's funeral (alliteration. ha!), and the sparks betwixt him and Benedict got to flying again.

Ok, I can buy a love story between a wealthy rancher's kid and a broke, orphaned Mexican/Indian kid. What I couldn't buy was this sex scene:

Destrie released his hair and spun him around. He kicked Benedict's legs as wide as they would go. Reaching down, he grabbed a handful of snow and held it in his warm palm until droplets trickled between his fingers. He couldn't wait. He and Benedict were almost the same height. He used the snow to lubricate Benedict's hole. He heard Benedict gasp when the icy water was pressed into the passage of his hot anus. He shoved back when Destrie's fingers speared inward, then quickly out. More snow and Benedict's ass colored from pale ivory to ruddy rose.

HE USED SNOW AS LUBE??! And both of them stayed hard? And Benedict's asshole didn't go numb from the ice?

Yeah, right, lady. Hit the 'delete' button on my Sony by the end of the next paragraph.

However, if you like your smexing with a little ice play, you can get the book here.

So since I just shit canned that book, I clicked on the next book on the list, which was Carol of the Bellskis.

Blurb:
Paralegal Seth Bellski is tired of being the secret lover of his boss, Lars Varga, founding partner of Finch & Varga Law. So when he asks Lars to spend Hanukkah with Seth's family at their kosher B and B in Whistler, B.C., and Lars refuses, Seth realizes he will never get his self-conscious boss out of the closet.

So Seth prepares to spend his Hanukkah holiday alone in the B and B. Instead he finds himself running the place, as his aunt and uncle are missing, and seven demanding, peculiar, and danger-prone guests have arrived. To make matters worse, Lars shows up, begging forgiveness. Lars's touches remind Seth of why he put up with his boss's behavior in the first place. If on

ly the words that came out of that beautiful mouth were as sweet as his kisses. But how can Seth find time to fix his broken relationship when the guests are demanding kosher, gluten-free diets, losing their pet terriers, and hitting their heads on the ice? Seth and Lars find themselves put through the paces of being a married couple, all while still broken up. But then again, if they can survive this Hanukah, maybe they'll be singing a carol of the Bellskis.

Bottom line up front:
Cute, but average. However, no snowball figging to be found here, so we'll add it to the 'win' column.

The rest:
Seth is finally fed up when he realizes his lover of a year is more concerned with the opinions of his co-workers than staying in his lover's good graces. In true diva fashion, he stomps off to Canada someplace. He must really have been mad, because who goes to Canada willingly? When they're not draft doging? Just kidding.

Sort of.

Anyways, Seth gets to the B&B, only to find out that his aunt and uncle aren't there, and the place is all locked up. He used the spare key to let himself in, but they still aren't back when the guests show up. Seth takes it upon himself to play host for Hanukkah while whatever passes for police in Canada search for his missing relatives. In the meantime, Lars shows up on the doorstep, wanting another chance.

I like Amara's writing. The characters took turns being incredibly annoying and absolutely adorable. The whole gluten, lactulose, soy, and who the heck knows what else intolerant couple drove me bugnuts. Yes, I know people like that in real life, and they are very difficult to feed. Seth was just pinch hitting for his family, and could have just told the intolerable couple to find someplace else to stay.

The one person who he was trying to toss out wouldn't go. Lars was given several invitations to pound snow, but he did a good job of proving his devotion to Seth by sticking it out and doing all the cooking for the guests. I really empathized with the guy, because his boyfriend was really pressuring him to come out to family and co-workers, and he just wasn't ready. Not everyone has to be out and proud, yanno? Many problems could have been solved if Lars just fired Seth, or asked him to find a job at another law firm, but that solution would have been entirely too easy.

Overall, Carol of the Bellskis was an endearing holiday story that will almost certainly be immediately forgotten once the last page is turned. There was just nothing that really stood out or drew me in. Keep the book in a holiday file and bring it out next year. It will seem like a whole new book, since you won't have remembered ever reading it before.

Go get your copy here.

Note to authors: hysterical rants are NOT the way to sell books, mmmkay?

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 03:43:57 GMT

Remember this article in the LA Weekly I was talking about a few days back? Yeah, a few things wrong with it, particularly the small fact that the author of the piece pretty much changed all of our sexual orientations to straight. First time I got interviewed for an article on gay romance and got shoved back in the closet, but whatevs.

The funny part is this twit, who is apparently having trouble making sells of his own books, has decided to drop in, screeching and sobbing because the...what did he call them? oh yes, the psycho-sexual hen party...is messing up the world's perception of real gay men with their pansy twinks who fall in love and are monogamous. How dare they?

Your writers are pretending to be gay men -- which they are not. These FRAUDS are poaching on the exceedingly hard-won territory of gay literature. As a result a lot of serious writing by gay men is being swept to one side while this psycho-sexual hen party has its way with my life and the lives of those I've loved. I have nothing but contempt for this.

HA! Dumbass.

Anyways, if you're bored this weekend and want a few moments of hilarity, go watch Ally Blue and Alex Beecroft bang their heads against a brick wall talking to this sniveling fucktard. Scroll down to the comments for all the fun. Or read the article again. There's authors, and rods shoved in cooters. Interesting reading, that.

Because two gorgeous men rubbing off IS flipping sexy...

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 00:06:19 GMT

Go over to LA weekly and read this article. It's about why women read gay romance, and it's pretty interesting. And I'm not just saying that because I was one of the women interviewed, lol. There's also cool pics of James Buchanan and Jet Mykles is there with bright pink hair too. Oh, and an interesting study where women got rods jammed up their hoohah. No, I didn't get to participate in that *frownyface*. And look at that cover pic. Hilarious!

A Dark Tide by Josh Lanyon

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 19:03:32 GMT

Bottom line up front:
As a mystery, it wasn't very mysterious. But that could be because I was significantly less interested in whodunit than whether Jake and Adrien were going to be Together Forever.

The rest: What's an Adrien English story without a dead body? Luckily, we'll never have to find out. As expected, there's dead people in the final installment of this much beloved series.

So our dear Adrien is expanding his bookstore and taking over the entire building now. Unfortunately, the other half of the building needs extensive renovation. It is during the renovations that the contractors come across some dessicated bones. Really, Adrien has the worst luck ever. Or not, since this is old meat and not the freshly killed variety he's been dealing with.

Some guy who lived in the building some fifty-odd years ago when it was a lodge came up missing and was presumed dead. Somebody else knows more than they're telling, because they keep trying to break into the building at night to find something. Curious Adrien hires this PI he knows...guy by the name of Jake Riordan...to investigate and find out what the heck is going on. Along the way, a few other people come up dead too, right after Jake interviews them.

It's all very interesting, I'm sure, but what I really wanted to know is: what happens between Jake and Adrien? Are they getting back together or what?

Much to my surprise, I was totally Team Jake in this book. Jake bucked up and swallowed the acid and all that at the end of the last book, and was just kind of waiting around for Adrien to forgive him. Adrien had gone through years of Jake's crap, and to top it off, the guy was cheating on him pretty much from jump street with another guy, not to mention the wife. Still, Jake retired from the force and came out to his family and did everything he could do to get Adrien back, and Adrien just isn't having it. Sadly, some things just aren't meant to be, yanno?

Tossed in like glittering diamonds amidst the rotted corpses of people and dreams were bright flashes of trademark Lanyon humor. This scene in particular nearly had me peeing, since it came at a crucial point in the story:

He spoke so quietly I had to strain to hear, “You remember asking me if I’d ever begged?”
I wiped the corner of my eyes, sniffed. “Is this about to get kinky?”
"Do you want it to?”
“Mmm.” I hastily wiped my nose. “Maybe. I read this thing about silk scarves and feathers once. I wouldn’t mind trying that one of these days.”
His mouth quirked. He said gravely, “I’ll keep that in mind."

Outside of the funny, you just can't go wrong reading anything Lanyon. The writing is, as always, crisp and clever and captivating and all the other cool 'c' words.

I almost didn't want to read the end, because it would be over. But then I remembered that I have all the books...the first edition print versions (pre-Loose ID), in some cases...so I could start at the beginning and read it all again.

You can get The Dark Tide here on Dec 22nd. If you're one of the deprived few who haven't even started the series, pull your head out of your ass and go get the books here. Go ahead, give yourself a Christmas pressie.

A Matter of Time series by Mary Calmes

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 07:04:00 GMT

Bottom line up front:
Adrien English, minus the great writing...and with no editing to speak of...mixed in with Twilight-ish gay fantasy elements.

The rest:
After reading Calmes' last book, Change of Heart, and loving it so much, I hit the author's backlist. All she had out was this series from Club Lighthouse Publishing. I think I shoulda just stuck with the book I liked.

The books start out with a stack of plot holes you could drive a bus through. Jory, our intrepid hero, is called in the middle of the night by a very good friend who has just left her husband. She forgot the dog, and asks him to swing by her place to pick it up, since she can't bear to be without the thing. Jory leaves the club in the middle of the night to go over to get the pup, arriving just in time to see a guy get shot. Apparently friend's husband is involved in some sort of organized crime, and Jory busted into the house in the middle of a police sting about to go down. The undercover cops weren't able to get enough evidence to convict friend's hubby on anything other than the murder charge, and Jory is the only witness to the murder. Now Jory's life is on the hit list, and Detective Kage has become his self-appointed bodyguard because Jory refuses to go into protective custody.

Errr...WHAT THE EFFF?
1)Throughout the series, Jory never again encounters Anna, the girl who is supposedly so close to Jory that she can call him at 2am to go get a flippin dog. Other than in vague references to what had people shooting at him in the first place, she is never mentioned again. Way to go, plot device o' convenience.

2)The undercover cops busted into the house as soon as they heard gunfire and pulled Jory out. But they don't have any evidence of anything, and need Jory to testify to the murder that happened because he's the only witness, and if Jory doesn't testify, Bad Guy will walk? Yeah, no. The police were ALREADY THERE. This being an age of technology, somebody had to be listening to something going on in the house, so they had to know for a fact that Bad Guy murdered someone. You have a body, the weapon, fingerprints, and a whole pile of DNA, for Chrissake. In what universe would you also need a witness? The police were already on the flippin property, about to bust Bad Guy for something else. There had to be at least 20 witnesses, so the whole premise that Jory is on some mob hit list because he's the only witness to a crime is pure bullshit.

3) Throughout the series, people randomly pop out of vans in the middle of the street to shoot at Jory, or show up at his old houses and mistakenly cut the occupant to bits. Despite this, he refuses to go into protective custody, saying he likes his job. Yet he has no family and very few close friends to speak of, so really nothing to lose by walking away and getting a new identity. And not only does he not go into protective custody...the little club bunny keeps right on dancing the night away pretty much every night in town,picking up random men for one night stands.

Everyone in this series, male and female, is drop dead gorgeous. No ugly people allowed in this world. All the rich, powerful men are either gay or adore Jory anyways. And they tend to steer Jory around by the neck. I never got that, why all the men put their hands on Jory's neck to guide him about the room.

Jory's relationship with his boss, Dane, is creepy at best and incredibly alarming. The guy pretty much tells Jory that he wants to own him, and does some really odd things to make that happen. Jory tries to establish independence, but he's completely overwhelmed and subsumed by the men in his life. If it wasn't Dane, it was Sam telling him where to live and what to do.

Despite all this, there is an energy and something really joyous about Calmes' writing that is utterly charming and captivating. I would like to see this series placed with a great editor who can polish the stories and fix the multiple grammar, spelling, and punctuation mistakes, as well as fixing the style some. The way the author put the conclusion at the beginning of every chapter, then backtracked with the events, drove me bugnuts. With a little work, this series would *glow*.

If you're in the mood for what essentially amounts to Adrien English fanfic, get this series and have a wonderful weekend reading the four stories. Get them here.

Black Wade Winner

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 23:53:34 GMT

Congrats to rhyssd !

Email me your mailing addy at knottykittykat (at) yahoo (dot) com, and I'll get your smokin hot pretties in the mail asap.

Gone to the Movies, M/M edition

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 23:40:45 GMT

From Bruno Gmunder, the dude what did the Black Wade art, comes his hilarious homofication of some of my fave movies. Here's some of my fave from his website:

When you don't actually want to Kill Bill:

It's Incredible!

I...really?

Thanks to amhartnett for the heads up on this. Must go to the website and flip through the book. There's some posters there that are just *wrong*. Hilarious, but wrong.

Black Wade! And you can win a copy!

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 18:33:19 GMT

Blurb:
The rough and merciless pirate Black Wade and his band are the scare of the seven seas. And just like his greed for gold is insatiable, his sexual craving knows no boundaries as well: When they board a British ship, Wade takes Lieutenant Jack Wilkins as a prisoner to satisfy his lust. At first Wilkins struggles with all his might, but soon he has to acknowledge that he actually has pleasure in the eager sexual encounters with the handsome pirate. In the meantime his fiancée Annabeth is waiting wistfully for the return of Jack, not knowing if he’s still alive. And on the pirate ship emotions are running high as well: Buccaneer Marak keeps a jealous watch over the prisoner Jack. He would love to polish Wade’s gun barrel himself. Due to the rising nervousness Wade realizes that he cannot allow himself the tender feelings he begins to have for Jack. To prove how merciless he is, he maroons Jack on a raft and relinquishes him to the forces of the wide ocean. But that’s nowhere near the end of the story…

The book:
Kris and Sarah introduced me to this bit of loveliness. I got my book in the mail yesterday, devoured it, and want more. The artwork is stunning, and the story is smoking hot. The interaction between Jack and Wade is powerful and poignant, and I really had fun reading this book. Even had I not enjoyed the story...the artwork here is just breathtaking. This is not a book to be missed.

The Contest:
Amazon said they were backordered indefinitely, so I ordered from B&N and forgot to cancel my Amazon order. Oddly, I got my book from Amazon a few days after I ordered it *rolls eyes*. The bastages. But now I have two copies of Black Wade.

Soooo...I got to thinking. My TBR pile is uninspiring. I need a great story to drown in. Give me a book rec and tell me why you liked it so. Or just toss your name in the hat if you read so many wonderful books that you can't pick ONE. Will pick someone at random Sunday at midnight, HST.

Bestest Christmas cookies EVER!

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 07:56:13 GMT

Saw this recipe, and it reminded me of l_prieto 's Cooking With Ergo. Haven't read it yet? Well, what the frick are you waiting for??! Read this one too while you're at it.

Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies

Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup or brown sugar
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila

Directions:
1) Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

2) Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one peastoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still ok, try another cup just in case.

3) Turn off the mixerer thingy.

7) Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

12) Pick the frigging fruit off the floor.

4) Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

1) Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

1) Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who geeves a sheet. Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

1) Add one table.

5) Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

9) Greash the oven.

14) Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

7) Don't forget to beat off the turner.

4) Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the wishdasher.

Cherry Mistmas !

is a natal day!

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 20:09:46 GMT

Happy Berfday, tc_blue !!!!!!!!!

Like Demon Sheep? Want one of your own?

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 01:00:46 GMT

The always fab Katiebabs is having a fun contest over on her blog.

Go check it out...and send me pics of your little demon sheep if you win!

Weekend of Really Bad Luck

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 00:14:50 GMT

Talk about a weekend of bad luck. I just read two books by two different authors whose work I've previously enjoyed and struck out both times.

Up first, Family Unit, or Grizzled Old Balls Knocking Together. Ok, it really wasn't quite that bad, but you'd never know it from the cover. The two main characters here are forty-five and nearly fifty, respectively. We're not talking nursing home romance here, for all that one of the two is raising his grandchild. He got started making babies in high school, his son made the same mistake, and you end up forty-five years old with a nine-year-old grandkid. Shit happens.

The writing itself didn't suck. What put me off, not counting the cover, was the odd age cliches that got comical in that really bad way. In one scene, the characters are going at it and fumble around for some condoms. Both had been in a dry spell for some time, so they're trying to check the expiration date on the condoms to make sure they're still good. Problem is, both of the old bastards are apparently nearly blind with it and cant read the small print. So then they have to fumble about for the reading glasses to go with that condom and lube.

Incidences like that occurred several times, and completely killed a book that I would otherwise have enjoyed. Particularly confusing was that both of the characters in this book were in very good shape with no medical problems, and exercised regularly.

Then I read Wings. I wanted to like this book, particularly since Gaven had me all Wow and Whoa! Owens took a similar theme and what could have been an interesting fantasy story and turned it completely ass-backwards til it was just *wrong*.

Anyar was a young guard who got kidnapped by the prince of a warring faction. Not only does the dude get the feathers plucked out of his wings so he can't fly for at least a year, he gets raped. Repeatedly. Until he falls in love with his captor and all that raping becomes ok because now they're In Love.

Yeah, no.

Stockholm Syndrome is just not sexy or romantic to me, and the clever writing didn't change my mind at all here. Several scenes were just nauseating- like the time Vanyae rubs one out on Anyar's ass, then rubs the sperms all over Anyar's mouth until he swallows it...all while Anyar is unconscious. And when Anyar wakes up long enough to get raped and is screaming in pain, Vanyae rather earnestly tells Anyar "You make it worse" because he's not breathing deep and slow.

What. The. Fuck.

The writing here didn't suck, but I can't deal with non-con at all, and most especially not non-con that gets twisted into "he's hurting me because he loves me', so this book got shit canned. As in deleted from Sony and tossed into Dont Read Again Ever file.

Cover art that makes the wallet come out

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 20:38:35 GMT

The one time Amazon got a recommendation right, I think. I was actually shopping for Xbox games for the bratling when Amazon was all 'hey, you should get something for you, too. Here, try this!'

I looked, drooled, and bought. No idea what the flip this book is about...other than the obvious, since I'm guessing that's not sweat on his face...but I want it anyways. If the inside sucks, I'll rip it out and frame the cover.

Blue Ruin 4: Need You Tonight by Katrina Strauss

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 18:21:06 GMT

Blurb:
Blue’s summer is heating up in more ways than one. When he befriends Dusty Sterling, he sees the opportunity to give his master Derek their first true threesome. But first, Blue must meet a requirement issued by Derek.

Derek is content with Blue as his exclusive lover, but when offered the chance to bring the beautiful Dusty into their bedroom, Derek's definitely tempted. He agrees to Blue’s idea under one condition—it’s Blue who must seduce Dusty.

Blind since birth, Dusty is proud, independent, and knows what—and who—he wants. In need of temporary shelter, he accepts an offer to stay with Derek and Blue. The fact that he finds them both attractive doesn’t hurt, but Dusty must let his hosts in on a secret—his unique and sometimes frightening way of “seeing.”

When Dusty’s nightmares reflect a pair of real-life murders, Blue uses his connections with the police to bring Dusty in on the case. The friends grow closer both in and out of the bedroom, but their bond will truly be tested by the evil that lurks in plain sight.

Bottom line up front:
Blue didn't annoy me as much as he did the last two books. Horny little bastage.

The rest:
Blue is back again, and the bodies are piling up as usual. And, as usual, there's yet another toy in the bed.

Blue finally meets pretty Dusty, the pretty silver-haired kid Derek was drooling over in the last story. By magical coincidence, he's Jodi's neighbor. Blue remembers how hard Derek was staring at Dusty, and decides to give his master a gift wrapped pressie. Of course, he's attracted to Dusty as well, so it's win all around.

Dusty isn't just blind...he sees dead people. Well, he has premonitions of little gay boys getting murdered by whoever was copycatting Zack. You know, the guy from the other books who was killing kids who looked like Blue? Well, Zack is in the process of going to prison, and the murders haven't stopped. Dusty can see what happens as it's happening, which unfortunately isn't soon enough to actually save anyone. In between all these macabre visions, he's getting sucked and fucked by Blue while Derek watches and rubs one out all by himself.

BR4 was a bit different than the others in that the M/s relationship between Derek and Blue was a bit more fuzzy. Derek tied the kids up, but more for their fun and pleasure than anything. Blue was pretty much running the show throughout the story, with a sort of half-assed reining in of Blue's wilder tendencies by Derek.

Need You Tonight is a cute and fluffy book. Light, airy, no real substance, and everything tied up neatly in a bow by the end. No harm, no foul, and we're all happy friends. The contrast from the last few intense books I read was startling. I think I would have enjoyed the read more if I were looking for something sweet and easy, but I really enjoyed the last few epics and this book was pure Chinese food...great tasting, but surprisingly unfulfilling, yanno?

Still, if you're a fan of our favorite Bluenette, or just need a fun and fluffy book to aid and abet your post crazy holiday mental escapism, BR4 will fit the bill nicely.

Get your copy here.

Today's discussion...Discrimination in the media, Part Deux

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 21:48:51 GMT

So since we're having an angsty ZOMG EVERYONE HATES TEH GHEYS week, I thought I'd keep it going with this one.

Remember at the 2003 AMAs, when Madonna kissed Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera? It was pretty hot, no? And replayed ad nauseum. Here it is, if you live under a rock and misssed it. Fast forward to 3:56 if you want teh sexxey:

So please to be explaining why, when Adam Lambert kisses his straight keyboardist, does that bit get edited out of the West Coast showing of the AMA's? Discuss!

For everyone who got the edited version. Changed the video out because the AMAs are issuing takedown notices. Kiss at 3:29:

PS: not a Glambert fan, and this performance was fairly hideous, but boy is he pretty to look at! Also, that roll across the stage? Not planned! He tripped going up the stairs, but made a fairly smooth recovery, lol.

Because I really want someone to prove me wrong

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 03:54:57 GMT

Well pull my hair and call me Nancy. There are GLBT authors in the universe who think that they can submit their book for consideration for a RITA, and they it will not only be judged, but judged fairly.

To my knowledge, RWA does not accept GLBT submissions for RITAs. Will have to hunt for where I saw it, but I distinctly remember being told that het authors can choose to not read a book, and rate it as "this isn't romance', because to them m/m romance is not. They won't even review m/m romance! Professional mags will take an author's money for ads, but glbt romances are not even eligible for review.

Anyways...prove me wrong. Prove to me that there are GLBT romances out there that are judged for RITAs. Go back as far as you wanna and find me ONE m/m romance that has been nominated in any category for the RITAs. Just one. Doesn't have to have won the category, just been one of the nominees (would that be the finals, I guess?). Will donate $200 to the charity of your choice benefitting the glbt community to the first person who can find one. Feel free to enlist other people to do the hunting for you if you haven't the time.

ETA: The fab Katiebabs has generously added another $100 to the pot, so keep looking. The RITAs have been around since...what? 1980?? You can't tell me that not ONE slashy romance made it to the finals in nearly 30 years?

Selective pisstivity...

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 19:15:44 GMT

...99.9% of the authors whining on DA, SBTB, and Twitter has it.

I've been thinking about this for a few days, and the more posts I see, the more annoyed I get.

This whole Harlequin getting into the vanity pub biz and RWA removing HQN's eligibility, and the authors who write for HQN whimpering and whining is bullshit. Yeah, and the authors who say they're so proud of how RWA took a stand against evil? You're fucktards too.

Where was all this wailing and gnashing of teeth and pulling out of hair and writing long blog posts protesting when RWA refused to allow GLBT authors to be recognized? When RWA pointed out that even if they did make GLBT books eligible for RITAs, they wouldn't be able to find anyone in their membership willing to read and judge them?

WTF with the double standard here? Why is it unfair that an author is 'being punished' by RWA for a decision their publisher made, when other authors who also write perfectly legitimate books can't get recognized either? Sucks to be part of the out crowd, dosn't it? But it was never a problem and it was never unfair until it happened to a large section of bestselling authors, rather than a small niche of relative unknowns.

Thought of the day...

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 18:45:54 GMT

see more Political Pictures

Change of Heart by Mary Calmes

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 22:44:13 GMT

Blurb:
As a young gay man—and a werepanther—all Jin Rayne yearns for is a normal life. Having fled his past, he wants nothing more than to start over, but Jin’s old life doesn’t want to let him go. When his travels bring him to a new city, he crosses paths with the leader of the local were-tribe. Logan Church is a shock and an enigma, and Jin fears that Logan is both the mate he fears and the love of his life. Jin doesn't want to go back to the old ways, and mating would irrevocably tie him to them.

But Jin is the mate Logan needs at his side to help him lead his tribe, and he won't give Jin up so easily. It will take time and trust for Jin to discover the joy in belonging to Logan and how to love without restraint.

Bottom line up front:
Finally! A book from DSP that was a well-paced, delicious read. And it had a very pretty cover.

The rest:
Jin is a werepanther who was rather rudely exiled from his birth pack by none other than his own father. Sadly, daddy dearest couldn't have just issued a polite "feel free to leave" after Jin came out to the pack. Oh, no. Instead, he and the rest of the pack stripped Jin naked and beat him until they thought he was dead, then dragged his carcass behind a vehicle to the middle of nowhere and left him there. Luckily for Jin, his best friend since forever, Crane, saved his life and the two ran away together.

The two friends randomly wander from town to town, doing odd jobs. Their relative anonymity came to an abrupt halt when they save the sister of one of the local pack leaders. Jin meets the guy, finds out that he's the mate that he's always avoided, and spends the rest of the story going back and forth between needing his independence and wanting to belong.

Jin is absolutely darling. He's got the usual hangups of a young gay man who was rather unceremoniously kicked out of the only life he'd ever knows. Despite this, he worked, and was just a pleasure to follow along. There were some pack dynamics that were a bit fuzzy. We're told Jin is this thing called a reah, which is supposedly rare and valuable, but I'm not sure I understood what the heck a reah is supposed to do, exactly. Jin seemed to just have a charisma booster that made everyone like him. His responsibilities within the pack were a bit evocative of what an omega would do, but although the fact that he *had* responsibilities was mentioned several times, he didn't actually do anything that I could see, and what his tasks were or should have been weren't clearly delineated.

I didn't quite buy a few bits in the story in relation to the mating with Logan. As typical with were animals of any type, their society was generally het. It was unusual for any werepanther to be gay. Logan himself was straight, and was in fact in the process of marrying the sister of another local pack leader when Jin came along. Still, Logan went right into rimming and sucking Jin off with nary a blink, shrugging it all off under the oft repeated phrase of "well, we're mates". That's nice, but Gay For You isn't my favorite trope, and it stretches the bounds of what I'm willing to believe to have a guy play hooky at his own engagement party to a woman to stick his tongue up some guy's ass.

Still, I was intrigued by the Egyptian mythology themes interwoven throughout the story, and the alternate civilization built on worship of Bast, my favorite Goddess of them all. The secondary characters were all sharply painted, and contributed to what was an overall compelling story.

I thought I was all were'd out, but I very much enjoyed Change of Heart, and can only hope that it's the fabulous start of a new favorite series by a new-to-me author. Calmes is the first author I've read in recent memory who is tempting me to do a little research and glom the backlist, if one exists.

Get your copy here.

Cover art WTF, part 1009

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 18:46:26 GMT

via the fab Katiebabs

Take a look at the cover for this Ellora's Cave book and tell me what you think it's about:

Nekkid girl, nekkid man, both snuggled up with dude's arms wrapped around girl....must be het romance, right?

WRONG!

Here's the synopsis:

It’s Natalie’s ten-year high school reunion and she’s reluctantly joined the planning committee. Things start to look up, though, when she finds that Haley Moore is on the committee—and she’s even more gorgeous than Natalie remembered.

Ten years before, Natalie and Haley had experimented sexually together, but when high school ended, they went their separate ways. Their unexpected reunion finds them ready to make up for lost time, both in bed and out.

OMFG , is f/f! False advertising, to say the least.

Happy Veteran's Day!!

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 18:16:10 GMT

To everyone I served with during my 7 years in the United States Navy- especially the ladies of the USS Kitty Hawk (CV-63), who taught me just how fun playing with girls could be. We had some rockin deployments, didn't we? I still have pics from Phattaya Beach, Thailand and Dubai, UAE that make me *laugh*....

To the amazing Army nurses and medics I work with now...

To everyone in uniform out there in the litter box of Iraq and Afghanistan fighting a useless and likely endless battle...

To everyone who has served in the past....

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SACRIFICE TO YOUR COUNTRY.

Sale on Samhain books/

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 22:27:47 GMT

If you haven't read JL Langley or Alex Beecroft, here's your chance to stock up!!

25% Rebate at All Romance and OmniLit on All Samhain Publishing, Ltd. Titles!

This Thanksgiving Season we’re giving something to you.
From November 10-November 24 readers will be receiving a 25% eBook Bucks rebate on all Samhain titles.
What are you waiting for? Hop on over to AllRomance.com or OmniLit.com and receive bucks back today…on us!

Sacred Fate by Eresse

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 22:18:35 GMT

Blurb:
In the dual-gendered realm of Ylandre, the great divide between the high-born True Bloods and the lower-ranked Half Bloods is deemed impassable by most. Rohyr Essendri dared to cross it when he took young Lassen Idana from his provincial town and made him his paramour. Lassen perforce learned how to navigate the intricate byways of life at court. What he never expected, however, was to fall in love with Rohyr, a most inadvisable and impractical thing to do when one’s lover is sovereign ruler of the land. But anything worth having is worth fighting for, both figuratively and, as Lassen discovers, literally speaking.

Bottom line up front:
I read mpreg. And, to my everlasting shock, I absolutely loved this book.

The rest:
I got this book specifically because I like the cover, and not because I did anything smart like read the blurb or the disclaimer or anything that normal people would do. Dang Anne Cain and her breathtaking art. Because of her, I randomly pulled a book off my TBR pile in a fit of boredom, and read it with absolutely no preconceived notions as to the content. This is not a book I would have bought, never mind read, otherwise. Just not my bag, yanno? Another rare occasion when I would have missed out on something wonderful.

My first clue that shit was about to go wrong was the prologue. It starts with the current king sitting at the bedside of a very ill woman, who shortly passes away. This woman wasn't family to the king, or even known to him. He just kinda showed up because she was THE LAST WOMAN BORN TO THEIR RACE. And she just died, having never married or had children. My mind sort of leaped ahead to images of extinction, or some sort of alien race coming in with females to interbreed or something. In the meantime, Chapter 1 is upon me.

Fast forward some two thousand years into the future, and we meet young Lassen. Young being subjective here, and Lassen is twenty-six. In this world, people (and by people, I mean men, since that's all that's left) age quite slowly. Thirty is the age of majority, forty is the age when making babies tends to happen, and the average lifespan is one hundred twenty or so. By comparison, twenty-six is young.

Anyways, the pretty and inquisitive young darling is on his way with the rest of his small town to await the emissaries of the Ardan, or king. The elders of the town have asked the Ardan for protection against incursions from a neighboring country. They are surprised when the Ardan, Rohyr, shows up. Surprise turns to shock when Rohyr agrees to provide protection for the town, but at a price. Rohyr had seen Lassen in the crowd, and asked to be given the young man in exchange for his protection. Seems a little weird that a king would want an underaged piece of ass in exchange for protecting a small town in the middle of nowhere, but what are convenient plot devices for, if not convenience?

Lassen gets given away to be the sexual playtoy of the king and goes to live in the capital city. He quickly falls in love with the smart and considerate Rohyr. Life is happy happy so much joy for a good decade. All that happy joy comes to an end when Rohyr is forced into a political marriage to his cousin, who predictably doesn't want Lassen around. Tyrde (I pronounced it 'turd', because he was one), the new...queen?...quickly hatches a plan to get rid of Lassen once and for all. Poor Lassen is left fighting for his love and his life.

The characterization and world building in Sacred Fate was just stunning. There was the occasional too much info dump, but for the most part readers got a good sense of the universe being presented without having to resort to maps and a history lesson. The characters that we were supposed to like were likable and relatable, and even the bad guys had a few redeeming qualities to make them seem more like good people gone wrong. This is one of those dense stories, where so much happens in the space of a few short paragraphs and pages. Even though the book was only some 160 pages long (yeah, don't let the 'plus novel' label fool you), it felt like it was much longer in a really good way. I was very much invested in the outcome.

The mpreg...you know, just the thought of it has squicked me something fierce in the past. The characters in this story are hermaphrodites, possessed of both male and female sexual characteristics. However, they're all identified as male, and it's a male society they live in. There's a choice whether to breed or not, and a wine that can be taken for contraception. Like most m/m stories, the sex here was mostly anal, and the times that it wasn't anal were very glossed over and faded to black quickly. Because the two main characters were very male, I didn't get the feeling that either was taking on a feminine role, and the pregnant parts just didn't bother me at all. I kept waiting to get uncomfortable, if not actually nauseous, but it never happened. Even pregnancy was sort of a natural progression of a loving relationship, and again, it wasn't dwelt upon ad nauseum.

The only time things could have gone icky for me was in the description of how the guys gave birth. It wasn't vaginally, and vagina was never mentioned by name anyways. It was swords and sheathes and seed pouches and seed channels. Babies came through the stomach, in a sort of Alien-ish explosion of...oh here's the part in the book:

His eyes drifted down to his abdomen. There was no sign as yet that he was breeding. That would not be obvious until the end of the fourth month of the half-year gestation period. Only then would his belly begin to swell enough to require looser clothing.

He traced the faint horizontal line that ran under his navel, almost a shade darker
than his skin. The birthing seam began to show a fortnight ago. It would continue to
darken in color, its thickness gradually diminishing as the time of birthing drew near before finally and naturally splitting open to permit the babe to emerge.

And what they gave birth to was more of an egg than anything:

Through the haze of exhaustion, he saw...their son, securely ensconced
in his natal shell. The shell looked like half the cooked white of an egg. No longer smeared with blood and birthing fluid, it was dark beige, its opaque surface streaked with the faintest traces of what looked like bluish veins.

[He] gaped when he saw the tiny infant cradled in its cushiony center, the faintly pulsing pale rose birth cord trailing across his belly to disappear into the folds of the shell surface. He had never seen a newborn fresh from the womb. It was the custom to keep days-old babies indoors and away from nonfamily members until the shell came off.

Despite his miniscule size, the child was completely formed. And judging from the
strength of his flailing arms and legs, healthy as well. The natal shell would protect him and provide nourishment until he was able to suckle. Whereupon the desiccated shell and cord would naturally detach.

Odd, but not enough to set off any squick alarms. Kinda cute, actually.

Sacred Fate is the first book I've read by this author. I was very much impressed by this intriguing, engrossing tale. The cover says 'Chronicles of Ylandre, Book One'. I cannot wait to see what's next.

Really, just go get your copy here. You'll like it. Promise.

No hitting!

knottykittykat@yahoo.com — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 22:06:51 GMT

I've just read my 5th story in a row where the bottom boy gets randomly smacked in the ass. Not BDSM stories or anything...two characters are going at it, dude on top hauls off and starts slapping other guy's ass.

That's...not sexy to me. Unless I'm actively in a scene, I don't want to be hit, and would be really pissed if someone thought it was cute or funny to start smacking me around mid stroke.

Why is spanking so popular in m/m romance, do you think?